Too much or too little

Expected Series and Multiple One-Shots1

This post contains the list of OC’s together with the series they star in. EVERYTHING is owned by me. I would hate it if you steal and somehow I found out. Remember, I have friends in high places and ears and eyes you can’t even imagine where. Stay good and enjoy my ride.

Sun-lit Nocturne Sky

Rihanna
Irma
Sharon
Erika
Nikki
Emma
YM
Tricia

Gerard
Matt Joann
Ramil
Mikhael Jhonnez
William

Lana
Tanya

Gaze above the sun-lit nocturne sky and believe that though we may not be together, the stars would not forget to shine.

Have you ever saw the sky a little before dawn and a little after dark, where the purple is splashed with a different, reddish, color rendering you mesmerized at its beauty.
Between night and day, where the sun happens to peek at the moon right before it vanishes and the moon happens to share the same sky with the sun even for a split second. That is life.

For RISEN8. If, somehow, this series reflects what happened in real life, then that is sheer coincidence. Everything is fictional… even the author.

Fashionista

Leila
Layla

Twins. They’re actually just models for clothes that I love to design.

Programming Java

Java Apaushe-Celine
Cobold Celine
Sergio Q. Lambda

Disney Carreon
Jason Suan

Despite what they say about being a programmer, having to face a computer 24/7 for the rest of your life actually has its quirks and kicks

What I percieve myself 10 or 20 years from now, as a programmer, as an otaku, as a person.

Posted under Uncategorized

The ‘joy’ of multitasking0

You might be wondering “okay, here’s another boring rant-about-my-busy-ness-blog as if we’re not busy too.” Well, this may be about being ‘busy’ but certainly it’s not what you first think of. Now, if you just bare with me, I’ll tell you what multitasking is all about.

Looking at today’s situation, it is unavoidable not to multitask, especially when one is very busy in his/her work. The most common example is eating one’s lunch while having a meeting discussion at the same time. Somehow, the society feels like it no longer has the luxury to do things one at a time. Everything is bound by a limit – by a deadline driving one to either abandon the others or multitask. Well, being busy can be a necessity to being successful. Hey, no one gets to the top without doing multiple things at once and still able to get a satisfactory outcome.

Now, what’s the big difference with the multitasking you’re thinking about and the multitasking I’m thinking about? A lot. I’m trying to be sarcastic here so that I won’t just blurt out unintelligent words but that doesn’t mean I really won’t just blurt out unintelligent words… that all depends on my mood during the duress of this very long hate blog.

First and foremost, I know someone will be going, and forgive the native dialect, “aguy-gipa-igo-na-sad-ko-acting-selfish-na-sad-ni-xa-oi-wala-nay-care-sa-akong-feelings” ramble ek ek. Let me just say, the people (coz it is more than one) don’t have a multiply, dA, wordpress, friendster blog, and livejournal account that I know of therefore I feel I had the right to burst out my frustration with little restraint yet still respecting privacy as possible or else I’ll go crazy and kill someone on the spot. Pent-up frustration makes me violent in real life. So ang ma-igo, igo. Sala ninyo kei nagpa-igo. I applause to those thick-skinned.

Since that has been taken care of, I will proceed. Damn, I feel like writing a fanfiction always placing a disclaimer to avoid issues or whatever crap. By the way, this isn’t fiction.

I often scowl at the current society’s perspective of teen relationships, or relationships in general. I mean, come on, if you see a couple going lovey dovey in the public eye, you would immediately assume that they already had sex. In fact, having sex is now a must in a relationship. What happened to the old times’ view of giving up one’s virginity after marriage? Is it just everyone’s too excited and curious that they can loose control of their lust and just grab their partner and just do it? Does it really mean that because a couple has been together for, I dunno, two or three years that they should ‘claim’ each other as a symbol of their everlasting love despite the nonexistent contract that truly symbolize unity called‘marriage’? I know a couple, or few, men that told their girlfriends to trust them. If you get the pun, you know what I’d mean. Despite the existence of a plastic barrier that prevents the sperm from meeting the egg, it’s never safe to saythat you trust the guy ‘coz you love him and you’re sure to be together forever when in actuality, you’re both in high school or college and still needing your parents money to support yourself ‘coz you can’t get a job with what you’re always playing DOTA or drink-‘til-you-drop.

I’m getting way over myself here, where’s multitasking there? I’m getting to it, actually.

So, teenage couples, right? And sex is their thing, right? What if you can’t get sex from your partner because she’s the type that saves sex for marriage? You, men, would get frustrated, right? Especially when there’s tons of porn available for all ages in the internet and you can’t do a single thing to your girl friend. Best friend hand can’t keep you company in the bathroom forever, right? You need another living, breathing, with squishy boobs and a vaginal cavity, to satisfy your unavoidable needs, right? This might not apply to men who vent out their frustration by acting gay-ish with their other male friends and start liking anime bishies – and I’m just saying.

And here’s where multitasking comes in! If you’re an avid fan of GMA’s and ABS-CBN’s koreanovelas, you would notice that their love story always involves a love triangle. The saddest and most melodramatic type of love triangle consists of a married couple and a whore/bitch/bastard – whatever you call those people who steals your husband/wife when you’re not looking. When the boyfriend can’t get on with his girl friend, (unless he’s saint-like-loyal and haven’t tasted the forbidden fruit yet) the first thing this society will push him to do is find an easy-getter (like a woman who had a huge crush on him but couldn’t let that crush manifest because the guy’s obviously taken), talk a little about his ‘depraved love life’, find a motel, then let’s get it on VABY! And if you find me offensive, then pardon me, I’m just expressing my freedom of speech therefore you shall express your right to remain silent.

Not only do you have a girl friend who loves you deeply and would give you everything, except sex, but you also have another girl friend who loves you deeply and would give you everything, including sex and staying low just so that you can be happy with the other girl but only because the other girl is a suicidal maniac who craves attention and would do anything even act like a complete idiot to get it. See? Multitasking, having two women at once, juggling schedules to satisfy both even if it meant keeping one in the dark.

You know what the sad part is? It’s when your girl friend is also multitasking. Of course, even with multitasking, you wouldn’t be in two places at once. One priority is going to get higher than the other. It’s like a business lunch: you wouldn’t be able to taste the food in your mouth because your mind is too caught up in listening to the client. The client is more important than the food because if you fail the client, you won’t get money to buy yourself food. In this case, one girl is more important than the other and if you ask me, I’ll put it this way: Girl with sex is more important than girl without sex because if you fail the girl with sex, you might not get some in the future since your girl is a total Maria Clara so in the end, you go with girl with sex while making sure girl without sex doesn’t know about it. But let’s not underestimate the so-called ‘woman’s instincts’. She’ll still find the wrong in your actions no matter how careful and unchanging you are. And when she does, she’ll go psycho for not knowing right away and eventually run to the nearest arms (and legs) willing to give comfort. However, despite the wrong you’ve done, she won’t leave you and despite the sex with the other girl, you really love your girl which makes all of us wonder whether you’re just in it for the sex or not… you’re just frustrated ‘coz you can’t have her legs spread for you and she still won’t spread it because she’s too old fashioned and you somehow respect and understand that but junior doesn’t.

This is getting way too long and I’m getting way to noisy/nosy so I’ll cut this right now despite knowing I’ll leave a lot of holes in the story and getting the reader worked up for nothing except for dumb ramblings. But, hey, they’ve also left me hanging, holing, and getting me worked up with their dumb ramblings that they claim to be explanations of their actions.

So SA NAGBASA NA KASABOT SA AKONG PASABOT, MAGHILOM NALANG TANG DUHA BECAUSE WE BOTH KNOW NA MASKI I-POST NAKOH NI SA TANANG BLOGS NAKOH, MASKI I-PUBLISH NAKOH NI SA NEWSPAPER OR I-DECLAIM NAKOH NI SA ENGLISH 27 NA CONTEST, WALA JAPON TA MABUHAT KAI, like I said earlier, I applause to those thick-skinned.

Posted under other

Te amo ex animo0

Posted under other

What the—?0

It looks like Friendster blog took up the style of wordpress… Imagine my shock.

Because I haven’t been posting here for a long time, I decided to place a visit and what a long time indeed… or maybe friendster blog has always been like this and I’m just gone for too long to remember. O_O

Sememstral Break has come and the dreaded wait before the release of grades has also come. I don’t feel positively confident with my performance this semester but I pray that I am able to salvage what’s left of me~!! D:
I pray that my scholarship won’t disappear but if it will, it’s totally my fault for not keeping up but I am praying and I did good with my final exams lately… but final exams are not the only basis for the grading system. sheesh.

But before I mourn (if failed) or rejoice (if not) on my grades, I will make use of the waiting time to update and revisit my online world/diaries/blogs etc. So let’s see, because of StumbleUpon, I have encountered lots of blogging sites and of the like so I had acquired  9 blogging sites: 8 old and 1 new. Lewl… So I only found 1 with StumbleUpon. <_<

I am also hoping to update my online works and revisit my DA which I keep on avoiding because of too many broken promises and my old works are taunting me to trash them D: I WANT TO TRASH THEM!! That thought makes me want to make a new DA account but let’s see if I have the patience. I am not avoiding my fanfiction and own fiction works despite my lack of attention on them. hahah.. I will get back on those soon. Hm… maybe when I finally understand livejournal and get it to change into the theme I want (even though I’m only a free user with limited access to features), I can get the peace of mind to continue my works.

That’s all for now. GOD speed and more power.

*cross posting this everywhere with slightly different versions per blog*

Posted under other

New Stress Outlet0

so…

I have a new blog and it’s possible I won’t be updating this. *It’s not like anyone’s reading it*

However, I won’t be erasing this blog since it has all my non-sical and non-sense post in which I cannot (would not) post in my new blog. Okay, maybe I’ll post some but definitely not all.

Just visit me here.

Posted under other

Itsumo Fuyu0

Itsumo Fuyu… Always Winter.. That is what I feel deep inside. Hm.. I can’t actually explain my feelings in english so forgive me if I write some in Cebuano or Tagalog… If I remember, I’ll translate them to english some day.

My heart is forever bound in winter.. the snow has piled up so much that whatever heat anyone may give is of no worth. It cannot melt the snow filling in my heart. I want to melt this snow but a part of me is not allowing any heat to enter. That part of me is what keeps me safe from humane feelings; keeping my heart from bleeding… The death cold stops my heart from its eternal bleeding, clogging up my veins and numbing my entire existence until no human emotions can bring me harm.

But no matter what that other part of me is doing to keep me protected, I still want to feel it.. That "warmth". I know I can never find that warmth, no.. not for a person like me.. A person that is not deserving to be loved. I’ve read somewhere that we can’t heal ourselves, God can’t heal us, if we don’t love ourselves. But how can I love myself? How can God, my almighty creator who gave up His son’s life for us, to forgive me? ME, who want nothing but lust.. ME, who feels nothing except fear.. ME, who only wants to hurt anybody who would give me that "warmth".

I know someone who’s willing to give me that "warmth" that I’ve been looking for.. he’s only waits for my word and he’ll do it. I want to say it. I DO. But, I’m afraid. Afraid to feel, afraid of hurt, afraid of hurting someone… Letting him give me that warmth is like an invitation for him to join me in hell.

My life is PURE HELL. I love the torture, I love the sorrow, I love getting hurt and getting people hurt because of me. No matter how much I say I’m sorry, I’m really laughing on the inside. Especially this person, the person who wants to give me warmth… I’ll hurt him… I’ll torture him.. I’ll strip him off of everything until I’m finally contented. I’ll consume his very essence and not leave him with anything. That’s what I want with him… a selfish hunger needed to be filled.

Thus my heart will always be in winter… ’cause I don’t want his warmth.. I don’t want his fire.. I…

…don’t want to hurt him

‘Cause…

I…

Posted under Uncategorized

About OPEN DOOR0

If you want to hear samples of music from OPEN DOOR and also anime music, just click the link named "eva playlist" on the previous post.

Posted under Music

Lyrics0

It's true, we're all a little insaneBut its so clearNow that I'm unchained

Fear is only in our mindsTaking over all the timeFear is only in our minds But its taking over all the time

You poor sweet innocent thingDry your eyes and testifyYou know you live to break me don't denySweet sacrifice

One day I'm gonna forget your nameAnd one sweet dayYou're gonna drown in my lost pain

Fear is only in our mindsTaking over all the timeFear is only in our minds But its taking over all the time

You poor sweet innocent thingDry your eyes and testifyAnd oh you love to hate me don't you honeyI'm your sacrifice

(I dream in darkness I sleep to die erase the silence erase my life our burning ashes blacken the day a world of nothingness blow me away]

Do you wonder why you hateAre you still too weak to survive your mistakes

You poor sweet innocent thingDry your eyes and testifyYou know you live to break me don't denySweet sacrifice

Feels like the weight of the worldLike God in heaven gave me a turnDon't cling to meI swear I can't fix youStill in the darkCan you fix me

FreefallFreefallAll through life

If you love me Then let go of meI wont be held down by who I used to beShe's nothing to me

Feels like the weight of the worldLike all my screaming has gone unheardAnd oh I know you don't believe in meSafe in the darkHow can you see

FreefallFreefallAll through life

If you love meThen let go of meI wont be held down by who I used to be

Lithium  

Posted under Music

Evanescence “The Open Door”0

I am really an Evanescence fanatic!! and it pains me to know that I’m not that very updated about this band. Oh well, I guess that’s life but I’ll try to be more updated. My new fave by the way is "Lithium" and "Snow White Queen"…

visit this site and be a member ———-> cdotaku  (the site of otakus in CDO)

The Open Door Album music:

source: wikipedia.org

Posted under Music

The 2nd semester0

It’s been a long time since I’ve wrote in my blog… I’m not even sure if anyone can read this!!!

Wahahahaha… It’ the 2nd semester and I’m already enrolled.

Hey everyone! Belated Souls Day… ehehe….

Posted under Just for fun